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You're Searching So Hard, You've Lost Yourself

And isn't it so? You look for yourself every where, trying to put your finger on that lost thread of memory and just when you do, it slips away. Train journeys are romantic, like that movie where a boy meets girl on a train journey that lasts a whole night and when they part ways in the morning, they become the best of friends. The number of compartments with people unknown, the wonderful probability that one of them knows you in some spiritual, magical sort of way. We expect others to complete us. But why?

I've learnt to stop searching for perfect happiness. Do not tire yourself with it, let it come to you. All you can do is not to hold it out. Embrace it with open arms and rid your heart of the fear of any hurt. Those who dare to keep their hearts out in the wild find happiness as a rapturous adventure.

Stop looking. It will come.

Prompted at: Search - Sunday Scribblings

Arabian Nights

{ Muscat, Old City }

It's weekend here in Oman and my favorite day of the week when we go out and gorge on anything we feel like eating. Wednesday means two days off the gym and I allow myself to eat gulab jamans too. I love this place because of its peaceful, quiet environment but mostly because its where my husband is. Anywhere is a home where he is. He has this amazing ability to make even an otherwise mundane drive into an extreme bit of an adventure.

I'm unable to write these days, not because I am out of ideas, but because I am so much full of them that I am unable to pick one. My mind keeps on wandering to every thing so fast I find it hard to make my little heart sit still and focus on one thing.

I'm discovering Oman all over again. I'm not sure if a social and extrovert would find it as good as I do sometimes, I'm more of an introvert. This is the perfect place to just stand still for some time, breathe in and enjoy a certain delicious laziness.

God: A Love Born of Faith

When do you know someone is listening to your prayers? When was the last time you knew the sorrow you carried in your fragile heart was incurable by every single doctor, surgeon or expert that walks on the face of this planet? Some things are granted by God alone. Like hearing the unsaid, like ridding your heart of fear, like giving you the strength of staying strong, like gifting you the courage to say the bitter truth, like holding your heart when it can easily turn cold, like holding you by your finger and it becomes your lifeline to sanity... like cradling you through nights no one knows you've cried. God and God alone lets you be the best you can be.

And likewise, some things only God knows. He gives you a protected life as a child, with loving parents who watch over you and protect you from all troubles. And when you grow up, God gives you one little bump at a time till you have wings to fly, till your faith becomes so strong you needn't anything else. God and God alone shapes you in the person you are meant to be by teaching you, showing you, loving you, testing you and then rewarding you.

My faith in people has been shaken not because people were untrustworthy, but because only one faith exists in this Universe and that is the faith in Allah. You and I may have different notions for what that Higher Being is but we all look in the same direction, we all look for the same faith, at the same sky. When my heart could turn icy cold, He held in in His Mighty Hands and kept it warm so many painful times. The thinnest chord that led me to Him was the strongest. He taught me, showed me, tested me and then, I believe, He decided to reward me. My heart blooms with His warmth. My faith in Him is my lifeline.

I wish you all a life of Faith, Belief, Love and Miracle that only God can create. Stay blessed.

You're Not Alone, I Promise

... and if you ever need me, you know where to find me. You're not alone.

Waking Up To Dreams

No the image does not go with the post. I just love these booties, that's all ;-)

After much thinking, I have finally settled for the theme of my debut book. I love writing short stories and the part I enjoy the most in them is making seemingly small moments as monumental as they really are sometimes. Please check out my selection of short stories here on the perfect line on the "Short Stories" link on the top menu bar. If you get time to read any of them, please take out a minute or two and leave a comment for any feedback you may have, any area you think needs improvement. Just pick one whose title grabs your attention. It would be so great if you could!

So, it's like I was putting off writing this first book that I had so much heart into because I wanted to have the perfect person to share it with. No time wasting trying to decide who would be the perfect one to name on my dedications page. This dream is mine to create, and my parents to have and enjoy, wholly. Life waits for no one, then what am I waiting for? I'm a go getter now and I love the new me! God willing, you're soon going to know me by my soon-to-be hard cover book in your favorite book store!

P.S. Thank you SO MUCH for the email messages, especially new year wishes, comments and your participation on my Facebook fan page. I'm very tight on schedule these days with a full time job that takes so much of time but which I absolutely love. I try my best to respond to all your emails, and will be back to replying to all your comments one by one. Just that for now, I need to focus a bit more on my career, since I'm learning new things every day. You guys are just awesome! *mwah!*

You know how to reach me.

Cheers!

- WarmSunshine

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Unfinished Stories

Unfinished stories have a way with calling out to you by your name. There is something vulnerable about them that invites nurturing; like a crying child who loses the way home. These unfinished stories want you to cradle them in your arms once more, to soothe them, deal with all their loose ends and complete them. How desperately you want to give in to all this subtle imploring and play the woman, the ever-nurturing mother. But what you don't know is that they want to seep into your system. That's is the only chance they have for survival. Do not let these abandoned tales get to you. They are like slow poison. Run far, far away.

No Place Left In Heaven

How would you feel if you opened your eyes to see your body lying on the floor and a horrifying realization dawns upon you that you are so-very-dead and TRAPPED!? Yikes! You see all the people you care about going about their daily chores, they have moved on, life has moved on, it's only you who is stuck at a dot where there is no touch, no sound, no sense of time and space. You are just one invisible lot of immense cold. And with time, you start growing hands and arms, a head hovering in thin air but that's all the reflection you can get off the full length bedroom mirror. Freaky? Totally!

I'm reading Her Fearful Symmetry by Audrey Niffenegger, inspired by her International bestseller, The Time Traveler's Wife. The above lines are from one of the characters in Her Fearful Symmetry. The Time Traveler's Wife was a splendid book. It spoke to me on different levels, but mainly on the level only women can connect. Ah I think I'm gonna go and watch the movie finally. Never was able to have the courage of seeing the movie, the book was just too perfect for me. Tonight shall be it! I need a dose of mushiness and romance tonight because I just dread the thought of a Monday and a loooong week ahead. (In case any of my bosses are reading this, I love my work! Completely!!)

Clare, Henry, here I come! Promise to sweep me off my feet tonight because I just love your love story!

See what else I'm reading? Link up here.

My Lonely City

A lonely city this is. I watch the sun go down with my deep brown eyes. It gives off shadows that spread like dark winged angels on my city that shines as a diamond by the radiant sun. I watch. The tall buildings. I think of the people living in each of them. People with budding hearts, hearts the beat, hearts that resonate with love. One of those hearts belong to me, that darling, silent, unknown heart that I have known for all time.

A lonely city this is. I watch scores and scores of people, and yet, sometimes it seems like a barren, deserted place. A lonely car I see far off, headed towards an unknown destination. An unknown journey. Take me with you, silent rider, and may be in the midst of not knowing, I'll strip off the last layer of camouflage that suffocates my skin, bare myself to you, in the hopes that you will know me for all my ugliness, for all my weaknesses, for all my sorrow.

A lonely city this is. Let's leave its quiet loneliness behind and drive away to our new mysterious stopping point. I want to lose my silence in yours. Tell me all your sorrows and may be, just may be, you can be convinced that I am what your dying heart needs. Your faint heart beat needs two warm hands to hold it and keep it from fading. Let those hands be mine. Then may be, you won't have to leave my lonely city by nightfall like this. May be , the loneliness won't intimidate you any longer, and may be you'll stay. For me.

Knowing Myself: A Haiku -- WordfulWednesday (51)

{Source}

"i want to forget

you; but then, how will I ever

remember myself"

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Hey, wait a minute! What's a haiku?

...who do you think you are, running around leaving scars, collecting your jar of hearts, and tearing love apart...

Thursdays bring the same nostalgic feelings as Octobers do. Kinda like, take me back in time when Thursday used to be the last working day of the week and Friday and Saturday were holidays. That makes Sunday as the first day of the week. We spent the day going out to my aunt's every Thursday and watching an old, crazy movie with my cousins. What am I missing about that time? I'm not sure. But the thing I miss most about my childhood was the eagerness to grow up and share what I had to give. Every second of my childhood still within reach of my recall has somehow been tied with the one person that I waited to meet and did meet only later, to be unsure of any feeling towards it.

Working since 7am, the crazy routine is taking its toll on me but at least it gives me no time to go into another train of thoughts. But Thursdays, ah, they are something I so dearly love. That's all for now, need to rush once more.

Question for the day: What was the fairy tale that has never failed to charm you?

Come by tomorrow!
Take care~

Title Courtesy: Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri

A Modern Fairy Tale -- WordfulWednesday (50) W/LINKY

"each step keeps pulling

us together; the calling of the

heart is still so strong!"

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Grab a button!

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Hey, wait a minute! What's a haiku?

WAIT A MINUTE!

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Simply follow this link and rate us a 5-star to vote for us.

Only 1 week left for voting to close, so every vote counts! Help us win!

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Thanks! You're awesome!

Oh Dear Me!

I'm writing Thank You notes, come and see!

Where Has Meqsi Been?

Hello all you wonderful people!

This place has been idle from last weekend and for those of you who have been coming in to check up on me and dropping in emails, thank you so much for the concern. It's been busy these last few days, including the Muslim festival of Eid ul-Adha. I have consistently stared at the Compose New Post screen every night but failed to come up with something to write. This isn't really a writer's block; it's one of those times when you've got so much running through your heard that it gets difficult picking up a single (cheerful) thought to share. My mind has been up and running on maximum capacity, to the point of leaving me absolutely incapable of jotting down anything. I want then every time you come here, you leave with a smile. And when that can't be managed justifiably, I just want to stick around to keeping it idle.

I just got a call from an aunt telling me she just discovered this place and that she read my something-something story that I wrote some 2 years back. It was about a brother and his little sister, Meenu, who were poor and probably missed out on so much that makes up our every day lives. But they were HAPPY. Happy like, really really happy and content with what they had. It's one of my fave short stories, and you can check it out {HERE}. I loved writing stories back then and I still do, but right now, I find it hard to sit and get myself in the mood of the scene. You can check up my old short stories on my old blog here. Do you think I should go back to writing stories? Tell me what you think about them.

Do you like my new header? I just felt like filling this place up with crazy, random colors.

For all of you who have requested free site banners, I'll start working on them shortly. Just have to take care of a few things before them.

Keep Shining!

It Takes Two -- A Haiku

love takes two and so

does passion; our souls tied together

catch me when i fall

Like this haiku?

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But what's a haiku?

New Books On My Shelf

And I'm thrilled that I have quite a list for now. I love to start a new one as soon as I'm done with one!

Here's my new list:

The classic by Bram Stoker

The aristocratic vampire that haunts the Transylvanian countryside has captivated readers' imaginations since it was first published in 1897. Hindle asserts that Dracula depicts an embattled man's struggle to recover his "deepest sense of himself as a man", making it the "ultimate terror myth".

Niffenegger weaves a captivating story in Her Fearful Symmetry about love and identity, about secrets and sisterhood, and about the tenacity of life--even after death.

A heart-wrenching, powerfully written novel that could do for Palestine what The Kite Runner did for Afghanistan.

From the famous episodes of the whitewashed fence and the ordeal in the cave to the trial of Injun Joe, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer is redolent of life in the Mississippi River towns in which Twain spent his own youth.

Appearing in a single collection for the first time, these five stories are considered to be Dostoevsky's very best short fiction of the period of his great novels.

The classic by Emily Bronte; my personal favorite

An intriguing tale of revenge in which the main characters are controlled by consuming passions.

What's on your night stand?

Happy Weekend!

The Connection Between Ariel's Red Hair And The Balding Prince -- None Really!

Don't call me weird but when I was a little girl, I dearly wished to be a mermaid. I was thoroughly taken by the red headed, free spirited Ariel from The Little Mermaid. There have been many nights when I used to pray as hard as I could for God to magically turn me into a mermaid when I woke up in the morning. I actually believed that will happen if I prayed hard enough. Why, I'll be so persuasive God will see how good I am and grant me this humble wish. Surely it will not be a big deal for him. And when I wake up and see that I have grown fins, I'll ask mama not to miss me too much and to set me free into the ocean. I didn't want to think about that part for now, it can be dealt with later. The more important task at hand was to live that free willed, free spirited life, and isn't that such a life demands sacrifices? Surely mama will understand and will move closer to the ocean so we can see and meet each other often. Realizing I had to have a Plan B, in case for some reason God decides not to turn me into a mermaid was to be, what else, but a human. That would be boring. But well, that was another way of being, wasn't it? I missed out being the lovely Ariel and meeting Prince Eric. Not to mention Flounder and Sebastian. Blah! I was crazy or what. Plan A was full of complications but was very rewarding; Plan B was easy, more natural to me and boring :/ No fish friends, no singing and dancing, no mane of flaming red hair, not having a father who was kind of the seven seas, no prince charming, (ahem). I was a sad puppy.

So where does this story lead to? No where actually, except that I got stuck on being a human and it turned out it wasn't so bad. Of course I had pangs of longing of being a mermaid till I was 13, but I eventually got over it. I grew up and tackled a few things and realized I didn't have to be a mermaid or a fish to be free spirited. I could do it right in my own skin and the way I was. It was just a matter of choice that always came with difficulty but was very rewarding. You shape yourself not by the color of your hair or anything you carry or wear. You define yourself simply by the choices you make in life.

Choose wisely!

P.S. Oh and have a Plan B, please. In case you mess up! Disney has this way of tampering with your child's ability to distinguish between real and absurd notions. You have been warned, parents!

P.P.S. This write up does not guide you into the How-To's of getting a Prince Charming. There aren't many. One of them is bald and already married, the other is hardly one for looks. Look elsewhere.

--Prompted at: Sunday Scribblings - Plan B

A Girl's Wish List: Hair, Nails, Wardrobe and Bags!

{I so love kitties, sigh!}

So I'm jobless these days. What the heck. I am enjoying the craziest of routines I have ever had in my life. Staying up all night watching horror movies or something really crappy on YouTube, sleeping at the brink of dawn, (obviously) waking up late, only to resume reading a romantic novel I bought second hand. No, no, let me make this VERY clear I'm not a romantic-novel-girl. I detest them. Personally I kinda think they are silly, especially the ones in which the girl is excessively pretty and the guy is hopelessly handsome and all they ever wanna do is make love *rolls eyes* I'm too old to believe love is like that. I'm reading such stuff just for the silly fun of it. Mindless I am these days, mindless I tell you. My mind is on vacation and I'm in no mood for a serious job hunt. That can wait till the time I'm ready to give it my 100% devotion once more. I'm thinking a lot, day dreaming about the things I need to do once I take charge again. I can do all that even now, but the real fun lies in doing it all by yourself, on your own pocket. The feeling of being self sufficient and independent is amazing! It's like a habit. And if you happen to be married, it tends to become a bad habit. So here goes my top ten things I want to do in no particular order:

1. I want a brand new hair cut.I've never tried many different things with my hair because I fear damaging them. Girls out there would know there's nothing like what a totally new hair cut can do when she wants a change! So I have the most expensive place in my mind already (how vain!) because I want it leave it to the professionals to treat me to something divine!

2. Dye my hair deep burgundy. I don't even know if it will suit me or not, but hey, what's wrong in trying? If not a burgundy then a fresh shade of brown will do.

3. Change my wardrobe. Completely. From scratch. Yes I mean it. And yes, I want to have a brand new stock of high heels. Deep red shades, very sexy.

4. Nail Art. Found a girl who does nail art in Lahore. Don't know about the rest but she does pretty well. I'm gona get it done and yes, I'm gonna show it off on my blog and not worry if I seem cheap in any way *LOL*

(Psst... I have a lot of nail art ideas coming up on my blog, ladies. Stay tuned!)

5. Curl up my hair. It's what I've always and always and always wanted since I was a little girl. I have LOVED the idea of curly hair. Curly, burgundy hair? Sounds awesome, doesn't it?

6. Learn pencil sketching properly. Haven't seen my artwork yet? Click HERE to check it out and tell me what you think about it.

7. Completing my masters and I wanna do it the best way I can, acing of course. (I feel a little embarrassed coming to my masters part so later in this list!) :D

8. Write a book. Well, this has nothing to do with me having a job or not; and it isn't something I can get done in a few days either. This is a long term plan. No harm in adding it to this list anyway.

9. See the world. I wanna go see the world with the royalties my book will give me. Yes I expect the book to be a hit! ;-) Optimism!

10. Have a rocking website someday. I'll be one of those famous writers who have a personal website address given on the back cover :P More site hits for me that way! Oh yes, and employing SEO as well. Do you know I have lately crossed an all time hits of 100,000 on this site? Cheers!!

I know this all sounds so vain, so extravagant and I may appear to be just like any spend thrift. But hey, you will never get to be 24 again!! Okay so I'm not 21 anymore but what the heck... I'm not gonna be 24 either! Better enjoy it while it lasts, girl.

Have a (vain-as-boys-call-it) wish list? Feel free to blog about it and share one here too!

Pucker up to some girl powa, guys! ;-)

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